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Menstrual problems: how to cope-in various situationsc-at home: husbands MENSTRUAL PROBLEMS: HOW TO COPE-IN VARIOUS SITUATIONSC-AT HOME: HUSBANDS
Men often have a rough time when their wives are suffering from the miseries. They get nagged for nothing, or plunged into depression, or bullied, or even physically attacked. Many say their wives are like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. Some just hang on until the black mood is over, wishing they knew what to do about it; some get out of the way and spend more time at work or the pub, others move out because they just can't take any more.
If your mood swings are coming between you and your partner there are some positive steps you can take to make life easier during the months while relaxation is beginning to take effect. The first is to talk everything over as freely and honestly as you can. Unlike some bosses, your husband won't sack you if you're honest. Marriage, after all, is a job for life if you want it to be. So talk and talk, and listen. Make sure he knows how you feel, but equally important, listen to what he has to say, so that you really understand the effect you're having on him. Between you, you'll probably come up with all sorts of solutions. And although honesty like this can be very painful, in the long run it can also pull you closer together. But make sure you start the talking in the weeks after your period!
Secondly, let him help you in any way he can. His housekeeping may not be as thorough as yours but accept it lovingly. I have known husbands who got their heads bitten off because they tried to help. They were very downcast and demoralized, because they had meant so well. Accepting gifts is as much of an art as offering them. And it is an art that you will find well worth cultivating.
Thirdly, don't forget about sex. Making love can be a great help at period time, apart from being a great pleasure. There is no reason why you cannot make love during a period. Some women who suffer from the cramps find that the pain turns them off completely. Others say that if they have a strong climax it seems to speed their period up. They loose blood freely and less painfully immediately afterwards. Some find that masturbating until they reach a climax has the same effect. Women who suffer from the miseries often find that once their periods have begun and they've returned to normal, they are turned on very easily and thoroughly enjoy love-making. Many women want to make amends for the bad time they have been giving their partners while they were feeling depressed or irritable. One of the odd things is that many women who nag their husbands, or even hit them, as if they hated them, actually feel very receptive and could easily be turned on if only they weren't being so discouraging with all that violence. It's very difficult for even the most loving man to handle a situation like that. But if he understands the cause and knows the right mixture of tact, tolerance, persuasion and affection, or whatever else it takes, and the couple do make love, this will often trigger the period to start. That in itself will stop all the difficulties of the past few days. It's really no wonder that women have a reputation for being perverse and irrational.
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What your doctor should know; women tell their stories